The year that happened

Where to start. First off let me say, I’m so happy to be writing again. It’s been a very long time. But I’m happy to have found my love for this again.

Just like everyone at the beginning of 2020, we had the unknown and fear of corona virus. I didn’t know what was going to happen. Like most, I was forced to close my business, and keep my daughter home from daycare. But we made it out the other side.

At the end of Lock down we finally decided to try for baby number 2. It would’ve happened so much sooner but trying to get a business off the ground in the middle of a pandemic is a tricky thing. So we waited.
And boy how lucky were we to fall pregnant first go!

I felt so blessed, and incredibly lucky. “We are going to have a brand new baby” I thought to myself as I wiped happy tears away from my eyes seeing those little lines.

I started looking at stylish maternity clothes, and thinking of the gender. Wondering what colour we would paint the nursery. I booked doctors appointments, and even started to feel very nauseous all the time.
So when I woke up at 4am sleeping in blood, my heart broke. I felt sick with sadness, panic and fear. I’d never gone through a miscarriage before, so I didn’t know what to do.

After hours in the emergency room and then bloods and a gp appointment it was confirmed I was indeed having a miscarriage.
I left with tears and a very empty feeling.

The next couple of days were the hardest. Just wrapping your head around the fact that yesterday I was pregnant and today, I am not.

Fast forward to a month later, the pain is gone now. And we are so ready for our rainbow baby. We are actively trying to get pregnant, but we will never ever forget our little “peppercorn” that was.

I am so happy to be leaving 2020 behind and starting fresh.
Here’s to 2021 the year of pregnancy, a little girl turning 4, a busy work year. And sharing my feelings xxx

The one that got away

Lets be honest, We all have that one person. The one person we cant forget. Does it mean we don’t love our spouse? Absolutely NOT! This person is your very first love. If your extremely lucky the person that your settled down with right now is your first love. if so yay for you! But if your joining the rest of the 44 million people on earth like me, who did not marry their first love (and let me say with good reason) That person is what i like to refer to as, The one that got away.

Now maybe they didn’t actually get away, More like you physically shoved them out the door! But you get my drift. Amongst all the hussle and bussle in life these days (Pre lockdown) we have screaming kids hanging off us and then big kids trying to hang off us the second we hop into bed at night, we forget. And then randomly once in a while you’ll be changing your 3rd bum for the morning or folding that basket of laundry while you listen to your little one breath on the monitor and it will HIT YOU LIKE A TON OF BRICKS (insert name here)

Into your head they pop. you feel your heart start racing, you may even crack a smile because youll think of something funny they once said. “Hmmm you think to yourself, I wonder what your doing”

*Logs onto facebook, and hits the search bar

As you scroll through photos of them happily living their new life, seeing photos of their new partner and maybe even babies Youll start to feel a little empty inside. You’ll relive those last few moments in your head. “Why did we break up again”? You might see a photo and think, “hmmm you got better with age, While you’re sitting in your trashed house wearing 3 day old pyjamas with spit up on them wondering where you took a wrong turn?

And you may even think about that person for the rest of the day. But then something magical will happen. Your little one will wake up, and be so happy to see you, or your husband will walk through the door and tell you that you look beautiful even though you know your on your 4th day with no shower. he will warmly embrace you and you’ll watch him be a dad and then you’ll realise something…

They didn’t get away, You went to exactly where you were meant to be going all along.

You just had the best pitt stop ever!!!!

Plans for 2020

IM BACK! And it’s permanent!

I’ve been on a break for the last 7 months. Time has absolutely flown by.

My break wasn’t intentional, but life happened. We moved into our new home and just became so busy. Evie turned 2, started day care and I started up a beauty business from home. Gasp*

Did I mention none of this was intentional? It’s like moving here lit my soul on fire and we just hit the fast forward button on our life, and here we are.

So what other amazing plans do we have for 2020? Drum roll please…..

Baby number 2!! We don’t plan on trying until October because ultimately I’d love to announce for Christmas. So right now I am in the middle of eating super healthy, taking lots of vitamins, and exercising! I’ve even been learning yoga! Let me tell you, not as easy as it looks! Basically just preparing my body to carry another human being.

Evie has also been in speech therapy for the last 5 months. She was diagnosed with a speech delay around 6 months ago. This has been a big factor in us waiting to have another baby, because her sessions are $320 a month. So we’d like her to have another year of sessions before we have the cost of another baby.

We haven’t done much to the house. We painted a feature wall in Evie’s bedroom and put sheer curtains up in our bedroom. But other than that I love our house the way it is. I mean if we won tattslotto there is a million things I’d change, but for now, life is pretty good just as it is!

What are your big plans for 2020?

B xx

Three weeks in our forever home

The night before moving day!

Is this right? Have we packed everything? Oh no did I pack my tooth brush already? You can just imagine how much sleep I got that night right? I think I managed to fall asleep right before 2am and was up at 5 with Evie. I was up and down a million times checking cupboards and draws, making sure we had underwear out so we could actually get dressed in the morning. Checking I had left out a bowl so Evie could eat breakfast. It was a very exhausting night.

Moving day!

As we sat patiently awaiting the arrival of the young man we had hired off air tasker, we checked boxes, taped up the last ones, and tried to squeeze in the last bits and bobs into our cars. Evie of course wanted to watch zero television that morning, I’m sure on some level she knew what was going on. And she wanted in on the action! Before we knew it my dad was pulling up with he’s big truck and out he jumped along with my 2 uncles. The boys jumped straight into loading up the truck, it took around 2 hours but we managed to get it all in one load. (Hurrah) but for those two hours I was basically just chasing after Evie trying to keep her out of the way for everyone carrying large items like our bed.

The first night

It’s always strange the first night you spend in a new house. God knows I’ve had many of houses. Hubby and I worked out that we’ve moved 9 times in 8 years. Did I mention he does love me? He is over the moon to never have to pack again. And so am I strangely. I normally love the thrill of a new home, it’s like an adventure for me. But I’m more than ready to settle down. Once we arrived here, no one took notice of any of the writing on the boxes I had carefully put instructions on each box and what room they were suppose to be put in. Not rocket science right? Well somehow we just managed to end up with a double garage FULL of boxes and bags.

We decided to completely ignore it and order take out. The only things hubby worried about for us was our bed, Evie’s cot and setting up the tv. To say we were exhausted was an understatement, stairs! Who the hell decided we should buy a double story home? I’m totally going to regret this when I’m 80 and have arthritis or something!

The first week

Once hubby went back to work, was when I really started to settle in. I normally sleep terribly in a new house and I hear every single noise but I sleep so soundly here and I feel the safest I ever have. I guess it really is home. I filled my days with finding places for everything and shopping. A LOT of shopping. I’ve never cared to much for home decor but now that we own our home I’m so house proud.

My next big mission was to give Evie an area downstairs she could play in while we are down here cooking and what not. We decided to convert the front lounge room into a play room for her and our future children. It’s safe to say our tv watching has come to a holt.

We are loving everything about this house. Even the neighbourhood is lovely, everyone is so friendly and there’s always so much to explore here. I’ve never been one for exercise but we’ve been out every single morning. Braving the 5 degree weather to be out exploring, Evie can not get enough of the park down the street.

I feel like we’ve moved to a different state/country. Moving here has been amazing for my family. Even for my mental health. I’m so motivated and happy here, it’s amazing what a big change can bring to your life. Can’t wait to see what life is like in 10 years.

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White chocolate and peanut butter cookies! Your family will love them…

I’ve been on a bit of a baking kick lately. I’m trying to be super organised and getting used to baking a lot as I plan to bake most weeks in the new house.

I can’t believe it is this weekend we move. So I better get baking!

We went food shopping over the weekend, and as we entered the store our toddler decided she would give her lungs a test run and see how loud she could scream, sounds like fun huh? So we quickly rushed around throwing random things in our trolley and we paid even quicker. Hubby was so bummed as we totally forgot to buy any biscuits! Biscuits are he’s favourite thing in the world (besides us) hehe. He loves a cuppa and some biscuits when he comes home from a long day of work. Such an old man he is.

So in an attempt to pull him out of he’s funk. I whipped up my super quick and chewy peanut butter and whites chocolate cookies. I had all the ingredients sitting in my cupboard and what better reason to use them up than a rainy day?

Ingredients:

2 cups of self raising flour

1 cup of peanut butter

1/2 cup of brown sugar

1/2 cup of caster sugar

1 large egg

A dash of vanilla

1 cup of melted butter

A good handful of white chocolate chips

Combine all ingredients in a bowl and mix together. You should have a firm dough texture. Pre heat oven to 180 degrees and roll out golf size balls ( I don’t flatten them out) onto a baking sheet. Bake for 10-12 minutes until lightly golden brown. I place them straight into an air tight container and allow them to cool inside. This insures the chewiness of the cookies..

My husband absolutely loves these. And I can assure you, your family will too!

Raspberry White Chocolate Muffins

Is there anything better than your whole house smelling like freshly baked muffins? If you live where I do, you’ll know just how expensive fresh berries are to buy.

I was lucky enough yesterday to find some fresh raspberries for $1:49 a punnet. What better way to use up some soft raspberries than muffins? I picked up some white chocolate too! I’ve tried and tested a few muffin recipes over the years and this is the best one by far!! Moist and fluffy also full of flavour!!

Raspberry and whites chocolate muffin recipe:

Ingredients:

2 cups of self raising flour

2 tea spoons of baking powder

A pinch of salt

1 cup of caster sugar

2 large eggs

A dash of vanilla

Half a cup of oil (olive oil is fine)

1 cup of milk

2 punnets of fresh raspberries

1 cup of whites chocolate bits

Method

Combine the flour, salt, baking powder and sugar in a bowl and set aside. In a seperate bowl combine eggs, milk, vanilla and oil and quickly wisk together. Pour the mixture into the flour and gently mix. Fold in the raspberries and white chocolate.

Scoop evenly into a 12 hole muffin tray and bake at 200 degrees for 12-15 mins. I like to put them straight into an air tight container straight out of the oven and allow them to cool inside. This keeps them super moist!!

You can use any berry and chocolate combination you like but these will not last long in your house!

Enjoy!

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How I built the perfect wardrobe!

If your like me, you cancel your plans on the regular due to finding yourself crying in your closet after having an absolute melt down because you have nothing to wear. And of course your hair just isn’t sitting right because it KNOWS you have nothing to wear!!

This was happening to me way to often. After you have a baby, it’s hard enough to like the way you look. It’s like giving birth to that baby effects every single part of your body. You’ll even start to resent your hair colour after giving birth ( yes we all know birthing a human doesn’t change the colour of your hair ) but believe me you’ll actually start to convince yourself it did. And you’ll hate it. You’ll want this drastic fresh change because you will talk yourself into the fact you’ll probably feel thinner if you colour your hair pink.

I just gave myself time.

When we came home I was sore. I had stitches across my belly. And I was trying to figure out who the hell let me out of the hospital unsupervised with a newborn baby. I lived in nothing but pyjamas and my husbands clothes. And there is nothing wrong with that! If we did have to go somewhere I wore fitness clothes that I bought from Kmart for next to nothing because I knew I wouldn’t be in them forever. It took me around a year to feel comfortable again. I just focused on being a mum. Not becoming skinny. Still to this day with an almost 2 year old. I’ve never worked out.

I waited till I was happy to shop.

I don’t dare step foot in a shop for clothes if I’m feeling crappy. Because I’ll most likely try on something that’s to small and I’ll end up feeling like I’m really fat and ugly. I waited until I could look at myself in the mirror wearing my undies and think wow I look good for birthing a human. And even now if I’m having a day, I look down at that tiny human and I feel so proud that my body did that!! And once I started really accepting and loving myself. I started to shop for a few things.

I’ve changed my mind set to quality over quantity!

Now the first thing I do if I see a piece of clothing I love is feel the fabric before I bother taking it off the wrack! I see if it’s stretchy, some pieces of clothing will already be a little bally on the wrack and I know it’s not even worth it because I’ll never be able to even wash it.

I think about every single season.

I was buying dresses in winter last year. You’ll find them cheaper in the off season and once summer actually comes along you’ll feel super organised.

I bought something every single week.

As the hustle and bustle of life passes us by, and we’re busy being mums and wives. $13 coming out of your bank over a week you will not notice. But you’ll be happy to stare at the new dress hanging in your wardrobe! This saves having to spend a couple of hundred to get some things when the weather changes all at once!

I bought second hand!

While I was doing this I browsed 𝗲𝗯𝗮𝘆 for hours and hours every night. Yes it seems obsessive. But I was determined to only purchase pieces that I was absolutely in love with. You know that feeling you get when you see that top and you gasp for air and go running over to find your size? I waited for those feelings and then I would buy!! Cheap or not if it wasn’t making me excited it wasn’t going to hang in my wardrobe!

I thought about every single scenario!

We’re not your average party people! We rarely go anywhere BUT that didn’t stop me from choosing that outfit for a birthday party, or that special dress I got second hand for $12 I could one day wear to a wedding! I’m even now equipped to go camping for a week with the cute and warm flannel shirts I own!

I planned and shopped and bought this beautiful collection over around a year. I really allowed myself time to heal from having my daughter and I’m so happy I did. I deserved that. I now no longer stress about clothes! Ever! I have literally prepared myself for every single situation I could ever be in. If my husband called me right now and said we have to be at a ballroom party in 20 minutes I know I could pull together an outfit! I couldn’t tell you if my hair would know i had the outfit but at least I’d look great from the head down right?

Before I turn 28

Yesterday was my 27th birthday, I never thought I would be 27 with a beautiful daughter and an adoring husband. I had a lovely birthday. I had visits from dear friends and family and was spoilt with lots of gifts.

Birthdays always get my brain ticking. Working in overdrive. Thoughts pop into my head like “What is in store for this next year ahead?” And its got me thinking where id like to be when my 28th birthday comes along. My first and ultimate wish is that I’m genuinely happy and content with my life. Don’t get me wrong I’m certainly happy, But I’m sure we could all be a little happier right? Well my goal is to actually not be able to be happier than I am in the present moment.

My second wish is to have my home looking just like I have imagined it in my mind since we purchased it (yes we actually have to move into it first) but I have an exact image of what I want this stunning home to look like once I’m done decorating it And I plan on having it completed by my next birthday.

 

My third and final wish is to grow into my writing. Be better than I am now. Enjoy it more than I do now and make more time for it than I do now. Writing is my heart and mind on paper so if you reading this, your reading apart of me!

 

Happy 27th birthday to me. You’ve done me proud, keep pushing!

 

 

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How this pasta bake allowed us to buy our first home

People constantly ask me, how we managed to buy our first home in just over 7 months. What did we give up? What did we sacrifice?

And I tell them. Everything! When you want something bad enough, there isn’t anything you won’t give. When I wanted to have a baby, I gave up smoking cold turkey one year before we started trying to fall pregnant to prepare my body and get rid of all those nasty toxins. And it was simple because I wanted a beautiful baby more than I wanted that dirty habit.

When we sat down and decided that we wanted a family home for our daughter and future child, we made lists of all our money and expenses. And the biggest thing that stuck out to us was our food bills. If you’ve read my post Becoming a thrifty family you’ll know all about how we transfered to shopping at Aldi. And Aldi alone.

The next step to doing this is, is to drop your expectations of what your nightly meal has to look like when it’s put down in front of you. Does this mean we sacrifice on taste? Definitely not! But this simple pasta bake probably cost us $4 to make and hubby has 2 days worth of left overs once we’ve eaten dinner.

It’s all just basic ingredients from Aldi that all cost under $1:50 each. But it’s how I decided to put it together that makes it super tasty!! Not only is it yummy but it’s meat free, bringing our meat costs way down.

We have 2 of those type of meals every week. And we’ve saved a fortune on food shopping. At first you may struggle to change your thinking, someone like my dad would never eat “cheap food” like this as he would call it, but it’s actually so tasty! Who doesn’t love cheesy, pasta goodness?

Because we dropped our noses out of the air, we are now the proud owners of a beautiful new home!

Give it a go!

22 days till the move and the week from hell

As most of you know, Evie woke on Mother’s Day sick! Well that cold that consisted of sneezing and green snot ended with the past 4 days of her vomiting every 5 mins and an emergency trip to the 24 hour clinic at 5am. I was told she had a viral infection that had spread into her ears which was causing her to vomit. You would’ve thought I was the one who was sick from all the crying I have done this week! And it’s only Thursday afternoon. I’m surprised I know the time or day from all the time we’ve spent in bed together, Evie and I.

But I’m happy to report after the worst nights sleep ever last night, due to the fact I was riddled with anxiety and waking every half hour to check she wasn’t vomiting in her sleep, she woke happy. Tired, but happy. No vomiting at all. (Que happy dance) she seems 90% better. So even though we should’ve been relaxing at home and recovering I suppose. We left the house trashed and drove up early this morning to see our new home. We braved the early morning air (which was 10 degrees) and walked to the park around the corner.

This would have to be the cutest park I’ve ever seen. It has a big steam train and cafe. A general store too. I can’t wait for Evie to make me cups of coffee there! And we’re lucky enough that this will be our local park. It’s around 100 meters from our new house.

Speaking of our new house I’m actually in shock that we only have 22 days left in this crap shack we live in now. (it’s not that bad but compared to our new home it is) I’m just being a spoilt brat. Have we started packing you ask? God no! We plan to just shove everything in boxes a few nights before hand and hope for the best.

After our park adventure we strolled around our new local shopping area and figured out the supermarket isles (an absolute must for a mum when your 10 mins from nap time and have ran out of milk) you gotta get in and get out! I love everything about this area and I can’t wait for our adventure to begin!

Evie is sleeping the last of her sickness away right now, I suppose I better get back to cleaning my crap shack!